Dear diary,
Today was quite the adventure! It all started with me waking up at dusk, feeling absolutely famished for some stress. I decided to take a trip to the local park to see if I could find any stressed out humans to feed on. As I was flying over the park, I saw a man frantically searching for his lost keys. Jackpot! I swooped down and sucked up all of his stress like a vampire vacuum cleaner. He was so relieved to find his keys that he didn't even notice me floating away.
After my little snack, I decided to head over to the mall for some retail therapy. I met up with my girlfriends and we went on a shopping spree like no other. We bought so many ridiculous things like feather boas, sparkly top hats, and a pair of shoes that were way too small for anyone to wear. But hey, who needs practicality when you have style, am I right?
As we were leaving the mall, we ran into none other than Dracula himself. He was out shopping for some new capes and couldn't resist showing off his latest finds to us. We all had a good laugh about his fashion choices and he even let me try on one of his capes. Let me tell you, nothing makes you feel more powerful than wearing a cape like Dracula.
Feeling fabulous in my new cape, I invited my girlfriends over to my castle for a little party. We danced to some music, shared juicy gossip, and played a game of "pin the fangs on the vampire." Surprisingly, no one got hurt in the making of that game.
As the night went on, we feasted on exotic foods like blood orange salad and bat wing cupcakes. I even surprised everyone with a special present - a live bat as a pet! Let's just say, chaos ensued as we tried to catch the bat flying around the castle.
Overall, today was a whirlwind of fun, laughter, and stress-eating. I may be a vampirix, but I also know how to have a good time. Can't wait to see what absurd adventures tomorrow brings!
Yours truly,
Mary Read (the vampirix, not the pirate)
She took the name of her inspiration, Mary Read, the famous pirate.
She likes Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain, but leads very serious battles. She has a knack for making money, therefore, your production of money will be increased. Her inspiration, Mary Read, was an English pirate during the Golden Age of Piracy.