02 Feb 2024
Dear Diary,
Oh boy, I had the strangest day today! I mean, stranger than usual. As a vampirix, my life is already pretty odd, but today took the cake – or should I say the coffin?
So, this morning, I decided to gather my scientist friends for a little experiment. You see, I'm really into chemistry and thought it would be hilarious to create a potion that turns garlic into bubblegum. I've always despised the irony of garlic being a vampire's worst nightmare, so I thought, why not turn it into something I'd actually enjoy?
After a series of bubbling, fizzing, and a minor explosion that almost turned me into a vampire firework, I ended up with the most peculiar pink potion. It smelled like a mix of lollipops and sulfur, but hey, weird smells and I go way back, so not a big deal.
I quickly mixed the potion with some garlic cloves and voilà! They transformed into bright, juicy bubblegum balls. Who would have thought science could be this deliciously absurd?
Now, you're probably wondering what I did with all that bubblegum garlic, right? Well, hold on to your coffins because here comes the twist. I decided to take my creation to the annual Transylvanian garlic festival. Oh, the joy those unsuspecting garlic enthusiasts were about to experience!
Armed with the bubblegum garlic, I set out on my trusty broomstick, flying through the night sky, belting out my favorite rock tunes. Let me tell you, Diary, nothing beats the feeling of soaring through the air while singing at the top of your lungs! It's exhilarating, especially when you pass by confused owls who give you the strangest looks.
Arriving at the garlic festival, I disguised myself as a garlic vendor, complete with fake garlic fangs. Oh, the irony! Displaying my bubblegum garlic, I enticed the visitors with promises of a taste that would blow their minds. They certainly had no idea what they were in for!
Soon enough, people started chewing on the garlic, expecting that familiar, pungent taste. The confusion that followed was priceless! The moment their mouths were filled with chewy bubblegum instead of garlic, their faces twisted into the most peculiar expressions. It was like watching a pack of zombies trying to solve a calculus problem!
Oh, the laughter that erupted from my vampirix heart! Tears streamed down my cheeks as I watched grown men and women blowing pink garlic bubbles. It was a sight to behold, Diary. I must have pranked at least a hundred unsuspecting garlic lovers.
As the night went on, the whole festival turned into a giant bubblegum garlic party, with people laughing, dancing, and entering bubblegum-blowing competitions. Who could have predicted that garlic bubbles would bring so much joy?
Now, Diary, I'm back in my cozy cave. The moon is glowing, and I can't help but count the stars, dreaming of being the first vampirix on Mars. Maybe one day, my love for science and space will take me there. But for now, I'll stick to making absurd inventions, laughing with my scientist friends, and pranking unsuspecting garlic enthusiasts.
Life as a vampirix may be weird, but it sure is a fascinating adventure!
Sleep tight, Diary, until our next wild nocturnal escapade.
Yours absurdly,
Mootzulea
2024-02-02
Mootzulea
A distant cousin of Dracula, Mootzulea grew up in the hills of Transylvania, mainly in the area of Sibiu.
He knows a lot of jokes but is very determined into battles. He is passionate about science and has a lot of scientist friends. Therefore, you will have an increased production of scientists. He dreams of going to Mars one day.
