12 Jul 2024
Dear Diary,
Today was quite the adventure! I woke up feeling extra thirsty for some stress, so I decided to hit up my favorite stress source - the mall during a holiday sale. As soon as I arrived, I could feel the tension in the air, and I knew it was going to be a feast for me.
I immediately started browsing through the stores, picking up on people's anxious vibes like a bloodhound. The sales were insane, and everyone was rushing around like headless chickens trying to snag the best deals. It was like a buffet of stress just waiting for me to dig in.
I made my way to the Pina Colada stand first, because a girl's gotta stay hydrated while she feeds, right? As I sipped on my delicious cocktail, I could feel the stress levels rising around me. It was like music to my ears (and my taste buds).
After my drink, I decided to hit up the clothing stores. The fitting rooms were a gold mine of stress, with people frantically trying on clothes and freaking out over their reflections. I couldn't help but chuckle to myself as I listened in on their inner monologues.
But the real jackpot came when I stumbled upon a group of girls gossiping about their love lives in the makeup section. The drama was so juicy, I could practically taste the stress oozing out of them. I couldn't resist joining in on the conversation, throwing in a few witty remarks and stirring the pot even more.
By the time I left the mall, I was feeling completely satisfied and energized. I had filled up on stress like a Thanksgiving feast, and I was ready to take on the world. But before heading home, I decided to swing by a party my girlfriends were throwing.
The night was a blur of music, laughter, and more stress-eating opportunities than I could have ever imagined. I danced like a wild princess warrior, chatted up a storm, and even managed to sneak in a few bites of stress here and there.
All in all, it was a day well spent for this vampirix with a taste for the absurd and the weird. Who needs blood when you can feast on stress and have a blast doing it?
Until next time, diary. Stay weird.
Yours truly,
Mary Read, the stress-eating vampirix
2024-07-12
Mary Read
She took the name of her inspiration, Mary Read, the famous pirate.
She likes Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain, but leads very serious battles. She has a knack for making money, therefore, your production of money will be increased. Her inspiration, Mary Read, was an English pirate during the Golden Age of Piracy.
